You often hear this statement by those who dismiss age-based stereotypes. I’ve done it too.
But then someone I know married someone who is almost half their age. Since then, I feel like I can’t help but looking at them a bit strangely. I mean, besides instances between a minor and an adult – where age definitely matters. What situations would one’s age affect your position? What kind of age gap for whatever situations do you find to be uncomfortable? If you have an age difference limit, why makes you decide on that limit?
© 2026 – SoulSequel
10 responses to “Is age just a number?”
Just a number that approximates something very real, like body and mental conditions due to time. A friend of mine who is my age (mid 20’s) got with a man that is in his 40’s. I felt odd about it too. We were raised in a society that thinks a lot about age like that. We have these biases built in for the most part, just as we do nudity. For me, I generally only will go for someone closer to my age. Like, I would like us to have similar interests, and I think growing up around the same time helps with what shows, movies, and music we watched and heard. I’m open to maybe there being someone outside of that age range though.
I once married someone 18 years older than myself. At 26 years old, I thought that the 45 year old man was mature enough to be settled down. He wanted a woman who stayed at home and was not going to mature. When I grew into the woman I was meant to be and had a desire to go to college, and owned a small business of my own, he decided that I was too old for him — at 33. He was now 51 and going through a mid-life crises. He found a 22 year old who wanted to stay at home and not pursue a career. He spent 30 years going through 22 year olds, like they were paper plates. Use them and move on. At 81, he died, having never had anyone who would stick by him. He died alone. The older he got, the less a 22 year old would see in him.
I consider 10 years difference to be acceptable. There is 8 years between my partner, Immortal Pirate, and myself. I was 8 years ahead of him and could offer a hand up, so that he could quit his job and be retired (as I am) and we could enjoy our “senior years” and find the pleasures in our lives. Even though I am 8 years older, he is 8 years wiser. So, we are equal.
258000+ years and counting…
Huge gap, probably, but it really matters not. I only look a little older than I did way back then when I landed on this rock you call Earth.
@immortal_pirate Obviously, that makes me older than anyone knows about.
age is a measurement, it’s a length of time.
the number is used to compare
I turn 60 this year and find that I am different around anyone under 40 and over 70.
Under that and over that and I find myself as an observer and between that, more as an active participant.
I doubt that I would have anything in common with anyone half my age, but sometimes have fun trying. I can enjoy myself with someone who makes the same effort towards finding common ground, but if they don’t; I won’t. I seem to size people up fairly quickly, rightly or wrongly, and can interact with enthusiasm or distance based on a vibe, just like *snap*
Yes… and no.
Age IS just a number.
BUT we assign value to that number
In terms of one person being a lot older or younger, there’s benefit to both parties
The older person gets to be taken care of by the younger person
The younger person gets the benefit of the older person’s experience and often money after they die.
In terms of the children – we can often underestimate them. They can be precocious and if they are… why limit them (in terms of education and opportunities for advancement)
True love can transcend a lot of age barriers. But age is a lot more than just a number. It’s an indicator of common social experiences growing up; and things the couple can connect on.
If one thinks that Elvis is King while the other worships the ground the Foo Fighters walk on, this will be a point of separation rather than one of unity. ( each goes into a separate room to play their music)
Those who grew up with the reality of world war, Cold War, Mr. Rogers and Jimmy Carter will be far different than those who grew up in later eras.
And then there is the prospect of one of the partners growing infirmed long before the other in needing to be cared for.
A couple that is “unequally yoked” creates a lot of unnecessary work for themselves; and seeds the relationship with many things that can grow up and work against unity.
Love can conquer this. But it may be too tired after fighting the fights, playing catch up and conceding the inequalities . . . To have much fun together!
People who marry outside of their demographic are hell on marketing data reliability, & are therefore a threat to national security, which in a country chosen by God(?),…. is nothing less than blasphemous heresy!
Tell ’em some guy on the internet said so.
i have decided it is just a number but is also very much not just a number
(queen of indecision wins again)
what i mean by this, it is as much an arbitrary number as a name…
but we also each own our number like we own our name (only, as much as we can pretend, we cant change our number like our name) so we do and feel what we will with it.)
as for age differences, it is between the individuals. and of course the law in some circumstances