Relationship status. has relationship been reduced to these two words on a social media page?
Yesterday, I went to meet with a lovely man who I needed to interview for a class. the topic was, the spiritual person. This person is a spiritual leader in the community and he gave me a little reminder about what relationship is. He keeps a red nose in his car. Whenever he is in a traffic jam, or sometimes just stopped at a light he gets it out and puts it on. He said he has gotten a few grunts and one person gave him the finger, but mostly he gets laughs, smiles, and waves. When he is in the grocery store line he interacts with babies, especially if they are fussy. He is IN relationship!
© 2026 – SoulSequel
21 responses to “What is your relationship status?”
To me, relationship means the thing that exists as a result of at least two parties interacting. I contribute, another contributes and what exists as a result is relationship.
With that in mind, I’m generally considered outgoing and I will often act to catalyze relationship. If I get decent feedback, the relationship spirals up. If I don’t…and forgive my use of the word, but it’s the most passionate word that I don’t use lightly; fuck it! I refuse to waste my energy on people who I imagine as drains.
@spitfire3dc to be a drain, one would keep taking, and not give anything back?
please expand more on what a drain is, with an example.
@Scarlett a drain is someone that merely consumes the energy contributed by another.
An example, the person who says, “I am so happy to see you and glad you dropped in” but never makes the same effort to drop in at your place. This one is insidious, because they are camouflaged in caring, but the caring is merely a superficial kind that makes them think they have value as a person. Fake people talk and real people do.
Then there are those we willingly allow ourselves to be drained by…our kids. Not all kids merely take, but a lot do. There is this think buried in their heads that we have to love them and that same consideration is buried within our psyche as well. It has to be, or the species would have died off after the first diaper change.
@spitfire3dc …emotional vampires…
Taken…
Partner and loving companion to a great guy.
Like this fellow you mentioned, my relationship status is “In”.
Perhaps social media should just stop beating about the bush and ask what is truly on its mind: “Availability for/ willingness to engage in meaningless casual sex”!
@griz that raises a question. Someone asked me this the other day, is there a way to ask a woman for sex without being considered abusive?
@Scarlett i think one would have to read the moment? let her lead? be honest. dont ask but do imply? depends on the sphere.
@BelleMadre
The realm of “Gentleman-hood” used to consider and allow for this.
But it was a very in-equal situation where the man was expected to exercise control over their innate, base nature that the woman was not expected to.
And still is not expected to.
True equality calls on many of these “luxuries of in-equal consideration”, to be sacrificed.
And that has all the appeal, of a lead balloon.
@Scarlett
Currently; no.
Because the micro-second ANY bad-feelings are triggered (intentionally or accidentally, rationally or irrationally), victim-hood thinking will twist it into “abuse”.
The “battle of the sexes” has NEVER been interested in equality.
Only control.
What once swung one way . . . now swings the other; and too often, with a vengeance.
i am in a slightly unhealthy relationship with cheese. we spend most evenings together. i think we probably see too much of each other.but im not going any where. sometimes we bring friends. pickles, crackers, even cranberry sauce if we want to mix things up a bit. sometimes i dont know what i would do without cheese!
its an open relationship. because i also have a steady relationship with coffee
@BelleMadre
So what happens when a relationship gets too . . . binding?
@griz thats where the ‘dates’ come in ;)
@BelleMadre
Hmm.
So more dates will keep your relationship from being full of shit?
There could be a ‘nugget’ of wisdom there!
@griz keeps em moving lol
oh geez
@BelleMadre
And flush with success!?
(Tho I could be mixing my metaphors for the sake of a laugh! But I am Canadian: trained in such feats by Masters like Greg Thomey and Rick Mercer!)
@griz
i am not in a romantic relationship but i am in loving relationships. with family, you know? i have a great mother and son relationship. and i have this crazy cat thing to keep me company. geez. sad?
there are so many relationships in our life. romantic, yes but so many others too. and i dont like to define my life or rather lack definition because i am not in a romantic relationship. im not sorry about it either. i dont introduce my self as or pronounce myself as a Single Mom. i might say im a mom, or its just us. but that term is technical and not really something i identify with our life. im a mom. and a woman. and a sister. and a friend. coworker. volunteer. these all involve social and special and casual and fun relationships. some mean more than others…
i dont even think im open to it right now. although that doesnt mean i dont respect it. or even sometimes want it, im just not into having it right now. or i have a different outlook than when i was younger and single. and free. right now i am Mom and that is enough to keep up with for this mostly strong woman… and im good with that.
heres a thing; i was bopping around the grocery store the other day. aisle by aisle i kept seeing this guy that i have seen around the neighbourhood. he always says hi to us if we pass on the sidewalk. friendly. attractive for sure. anyway at some points in our shopping we said Hi, laughed when we came down another aisle, Hey Again… talked a second about what we were looking for. then he sort of blurted Are You Single? and i literally Laughed Out Loud. like i giggled.loudly. a surprised blurty giggle. Super Cool Response Not Socially Awkward At ALL! Geez!
because it was such a foreign concept to me. because i dont feel single. i dont feel alone. he was like Oh Never Mind i guess thats my answer. and i laughed some more. said something awkward about well i Am single but havent really thought of myself that way in a long time. im a mom and that sort of takes up all of me. at some point im sure i stopped babbling awkardly long enough for him to get a word in, mostly to exit with more dignity than i was exuding :D See you some other time…
why did i giggle? it was good natured. but it was just such a random public on the spot bold question. i really did make me laugh. who Does that? apparently normal single people?
Complicated. Other than things like this, I try not to connect with many people. I have a hard time keeping myself connected to family. It has nothing to do with them, but I just have a hard time connecting with them. May have to do with our interests not aligning or our opinions differing to the point where I’d rather be quiet and avoid an argument or debate that I just really don’t want.
Strangers that could be friends, I tend to distance myself when I see it happening because I don’t want the change in my life. Like, I have the friends I have. I don’t want to run into a thing where I am spending time with the new people and not my older friends, if that makes sense. I don’t want to make plans with the new people to then have to turn down my other friends.
As for a significant other, I don’t really ever think about it. Been there, done that, basically. I just have issues with that type of relationship. I just can’t do it, and I don’t want the possibility of me dragging the person down. With my insecurities and lack of motivation, I’m an anchor in quicksand for someone. I’d rather not ruin someone’s life like that, lol, or at least roadblock it.
Then there is the strangers that one deals with everyday. I am antisocial. I don’t acknowledge them unless they speak to me first.
Has this guy with a red nose actually led any real spirits, or is this one of those tradition polisher tax dodges?