This is a very simple question and I hope you can stay focussed on a very specific response instead of trying to use it to bend it away from what I am trying to understand.
I’m try to figure out if we, with our very broad range of opinions, even know what we want, more than we know what we don’t want??
I feel loved when someone gives me a gift, not necessarily a thing, that illustrates that they want to make me happy.
An example, an aunt brought me some cookies she made that I raved about when we use to visit her as kids. My gift was making her feel good and she reciprocated. She gave them to me with a real hug. I felt loved.
© 2026 – SoulSequel
19 responses to “What makes you feel loved?”
Someone “enriching me” at their expense and wanting nothing in return.
Such a thing doesn’t exist, sadly. And before you go to your typical jumping off point to the “life” that you keep talking about… think about it. A person who follows christ / accepts him MUST follow his teachings, do his will. This is not a “gift” that asks for nothing in return. It’s a gift that asks for EVERYTHING a person is, and can ever be from that moment forward FOREVER!
Your not finding something is no proof that it does not exist. There is a lot of dark ego in such a proclamation.
Followers of Christ CHOOSE to obey out of love: inspired by the very great love that has been shown us by God. To do it just for personal gain is selfish profiteering: and to do it to avoid consequence is just fear. Spiritual fellowship beyond self has never been achieved. Both are 100% functions of self — of the flesh.
And even without this I can’t think of single one of Christ’s teachings that is not just a good thing to be doing even if there is no spiritual paradigm attached.
You were indoctrinated in legalism Jear: not love.
You are like a man who has spent decades consuming thorny cactus: and now run around bitterly proclaiming the evils of grapes.
I didn’t say such obedience is perfect. Neither did I say that the ideas behind them were bad. The ideas behind them, in many instances are good things like forgiveness, not stealing or murdering. Equally so, there are bad ideas – things like sprinkling blood to cure skin disease and disallowing mixed fabrics. Then there are ideas that should be in there that are not: a lot harsher penalties for rapists – maybe even the death penalty.
At day’s end, the core thing I am getting at is that faith an all consuming thing. And this singlemindedness can’t always be a good thing.
I would assert that it is very important to separate the Old Testament from the New Testament. They are different Covenants; to different peoples; in different states of racial maturity; for two distinctly different purposes. (The OT was always destined to fail; to show that legalism, religion, and human endeavor (works of the flesh) would always be insufficient. It lasted for so long because we are a very stubborn race; even wanting to persist in these things long after their folly has been revealed and a better system established. Your church experience is some of the strongest evidence for this.
I would also invite you to remember that faith is hardwired into us. One doesn’t turn it off as much as they just switch loyalties.
A prime example is all consuming faith in the current state of human understanding, reason, intelligence and science. These are excellent tools. But they are lousy things to put our faith in in the holdup as religions that will justify and or redeem us: save us or make us right[eous].
I was asking for prayer for getting a job. The “common sense” thing to do would be to pick up the phone and make introductions to get me a job. But they did not. It’s like saying “Be warm and fed” but doing nothing about the need. Having said this, prayer should have been sufficient. Faith moving mountains anyone? (In either case if faith / prayer can *literally* “throw a mountain into the sea” getting someone food or clothing or a job through prayer should be a cinch for god. The movement of a mountain in terms of energy expenditure would be WAY more than the materialization of such things)
In regards to faith being something “in bred” / hardwired/ something that’s always going to be a part of us no matter what — how do you know that instead of a creator placing it there (in Christian parlance , the term would be “a god shaped hole”) what prevents that need simply being something that evolved through our eons of time that it took mankind to become what we are today? There’s plenty of things in our DNA that simply don’t need to be there. Could this be one of those things that may eventually cease to exist as we advance further? Fast forward a millennium. This might very well be!
But even with the idea the testaments were for different peoples, different times, different circumstances, that is still a piss poor excuse for the moral teachings in them. A divine being knowing that huge sections of the old testament would be problematic, why not find a way of editing them out… or simply not have them recording them to begin with? Why not have the new testament updated further — or have a “new” new testament – so the new testament might be called the “middle testament” (I know it sounds a bit of double talk, but a testament newer than the one we currently have is the idea)? At this point, due to the reality that the god of the bible is not only silent – but *also* fails to continue to do the miracles, the “mighty deeds” that are showcased in the old testament and beginning of the new, the text simply falls into the category of myth, even if the ideas are good — which BTW have been espoused *many times* elsewhere *in other religious texts* before the authors of the bible wrote it down!! It’s like some of the stories in the bible are ripped out of other culture’s myths and legends, simply presented in a new format. And no one seems to make this connection or seem to care!
So you curse God because others fail???
And you are still trying to leverage control over God. Faith Moving Mountains could well be literal physical. But wouldn’t that involve the assumption that God put them out in in the wrong place!? Also point out one instance where what Jesus said was not spiritual allegory. Again you are trying to get God to change others in the very physical nature of the world before you will even consider changing your own heart. It is a form of self worship that I see often. “It should be a cinch for God to do . . what I want him to do!”
You should not expect any answer to prayers with such a f***** up attitude!
This scenario of Faith being recessive, bred out over time? Considering how lustily we greed for it probably not anytime soon! Our main drive right now seems to be the substitute faith in ” the Perfection Beyond us” for ” faith in just us”. Again your process is the epitome of this. You crave the worship of an imperfect foolish god.
Your entire problem seems to be you’re using the Bible as some kind of how to manual for physical things. Does ” in Spirit and in truth” have no meaning for you?
Edit things out?? Are you now proposing to rewrite history to our benefit??
You spend so much time griping about things that aren’t the way you would like them to be that you have no time left to search for a truth Beyond you.
,,,,broads eyeballin’ me & laughing at the silly shit I say.
….dudes laughing at the silly shit I say, but not eyeballin’ me.
This is what makes me feel loved.
Simple things like last Saturday evening we spent with our friends and their 2 little boys. When they put their 3 year old to bed he said, “I can’t wait until (G&G) come back so we can play again.” Or when my kitty hears my car pull up the street and she runs out to meet me at the gate. That is love.
Homemade cooking is an act of love, and when someone shares it with you; boy oh boy….love, love, love.
Everything Lady Barbara does…
Oh, you are going to get a cinnamon pull-apart, for sure.
That cinnamon pull apart was MMMMMM MMMMMM GOOD!
Special hugs from Immortal Pirate. The special hugs are not the ones when I come to him for a hug. The really special hugs are when I am busy doing something and he approaches me to hug me. That makes me feel loved. Or, when I am doing something and I am fucking it all up —- I am up to my ass in alligators —- and Immortal Pirate is there to make it right again. I feel loved with everything he does for me.
when my wife catches me checking out her ass, then smiling.
Being thought of unexpectedly makes me feel loved. When someone considers my feelings and thoughts when I am not around, for me, that is a genuine reminder that I am in their hearts.
Most of us have busy day to day lives. It’s so easy to forget things and even people for a while. But when I tell my friend that I’m at home sick with the flu and she drops off a thoughtful “care package” an hour later – that is love. When I come home after a long day of work to find that my kids have gone above and beyond in their chores so I have less to do – that is love. It’s these small gestures that make me appreciate those in my life and make me want to be a better person for those around me. I try to return these types of loving reminders when I am able to, but I think that authentic moments far outshine the ones that we plan. So I just listen for life’s spontaneous cues for the opportunity.
simple gestures, hugs smiles compliments. when someone notices something individual about me. little home made gifts. the cards and drawings my son makes for me. the things my friends knit. you know? the real gestures
This is a hard question for me. ‘Feel’ is the key word here. I’m not sure anymore. I can easily be forgetting, but I don’t recall anything in recent memory that made me feel it. In saying that though, there are things that people do that show me that they love me. I know they love me, but it is just not something I usually feel. It is usually just something I understand. Grandma making me peanut butter cookies. People, like my mom, consistently asking me what I want for my birthday or Christmas even though I keep saying I don’t want anything and they should keep their money. When I show interest in a movie and someone, like my uncle, asks when it comes out so we can go see it. When people, like my brother, asks me to hang out even though they knows I hate going places and being around people, and my brother having his talks with me. The time one of my best friends randomly sent an Easter gift to me (he lives in a different state.) Maybe I feel it but I just don’t understand what it feels like? Either way, I understand the moments at least.
I hope this doesn’t count as going off on a tangent, but maybe i need to write this out, (even if it is a long ramble), more than i need to follow the instruction, because this question made me think.
For a long time, i believe my primary love language was words of affirmation. I think this became a part of my blueprint because when i was a child i did not get positive words. The words from the woman who was the first sound i ever heard, (my mother’s heartbeat) were not loving. so as i went through life, when i would receive words of affirmation, this translated as love to me (or so i thought). Secondary love language was physical touch. I believe this was because from a very early age, there was some sexual abuse on the part of my father, and i think this said to me, touch is love. Later, he would emotionally distance himself from me. These things, i feel like I have healed from them now, and understand they were all a part of generational trauma and pain.
So, moving forward to now, I still enjoy the positive words to a degree. i can feel them touch that part of my brain that i guess still needs that in some way. I also like physical touch, cuddling provides oxytocin, a powerfully addictive chemical.
There are also still some shards left over from childhood, wherein i apparently want to be preferred. To be preferred makes me feel loved.
However, there is something more to it than all of the above. There is something else that makes me feel loved, something more expansive. I think that presence makes me feel loved. Experience. Experiencing the surplus of existence. The other day i was in the forest hiking, I went across a bridge, over some stones, and down a trail, until i reached a beautiful lake. I stared out over it, and the multitude of trees that surrounded it. I was alone not. I felt sooo completely loved, the mostest loved i ever felt loved. So i feel like there is some component something bigger than what we think of as love. there is a more to it than what we know on this itty bitty human plane, where ego consciousness lives, altho, we can love that, too. Participation, that i get to be a part of “the all” makes me feel loved.
Being loved, by a lot of folks…
Not listening to guys that lick their own dicks like your self?